maru

i have been hearing lots of good things about maru and finally got the chance to go last night!  we thought we were going for happy hour but it turned out they didn't really have a happy hour but i was fine with shelling out cash money for delicious drinks and awesome sushi.

my one disappointment was that they did not have a chirashi on the menu but i bet if i would have asked for it they could have made it for me.  they did have a bacon roll that all of my friends were freaking out over and although i am not normally a huge fan of creative meats in sushi i felt that i needed to make an exception for bacon.

the rolls were really good and i would like to go back to try their sushi in a less adorned format because the quality of the fish was great.  i was also pleased with the fact that they embrace bourbon cocktails whereas pretty much every place around here is like "omg yes we have a list of 85 tinis but that is it" for cocktail menus.  but i know you guys are sick of hearing me bitch about that so i will shut up.

i liked the layout and the ambience.  there is at least one other location that i know of so i am talking about the one on lake lansing road.  really high ceilings, lots of light, simple concrete and wood design.  one thing i didn't think was great was service.  i went a looooong time without water which i hate and also, when the waitress took my empty old fashioned glass, she did not ask me if i wanted another one.

i was on the fence and would have said yes to another one of their overpriced cocktails if asked, but wasn't going to actively hunt her down to order one.  i always think it is weird when servers don't offer another drink because i am so often in that on the fence, easily persuaded mode, and they could make a lot more cash money off me with very little effort.

ok i smell bacon right now, or i think i smell bacon, maybe i am just making it up in my head, so i have to go raid my fridge for my leftover sexy bacon roll that is going to be all dried up by now but i am going to eat anyway.

eaglemonk pub and brewery

matt and melissa got this book of like every brewery in michigan and the goal is to hit as many of them as possible this summer.  they decided we should start early and we went to eaglemonk a few weeks ago because it's right around the corner.

don't go here for the food.  we got panini and it was basically white bread with some meager filling and not much flavor.  i can't even remember what kind of panini i got which is like totally unheard of for me.  it was that unmemorable.

what you should come here for is the beer and the atmosphere.  i also can't remember what kind of beer i had (ok full disclosure... we were at zoobie's before and i drank some ridiculous 13% beer and everything after that is a little fuzzy).  the mugs hanging from the ceiling are made by a local artist and they are amazing and you can buy one and keep it there and then just get refills whenever you go.  i wanted one but melissa was like "just buy one of those at an art fair this summer and it will be cheaper and you can keep it" and i was like "oh ok good idea."

it's mostly just locals hanging out and most of them seem like regulars.  i wouldn't necessarily go out of your way for it, but it's definitely worth a stop if you're in the area.  there's also a room in back with like shuffleboard or ping pong or foosball or something if the beer isn't enough entertainment for you.  clearly it was enough for me...

hopcat

so matt is like "quit pretending to be surprised about all the good beer here, you're from michigan for crying out loud" but i can't because i am still amazed!  until moving here, i did not realize the state of beer affairs here and i will not get over it for a while.

one of the best new additions to the local beer (and food) scene is hopcat which i hear opened in like august or something.  rumor has it they have a location in grand rapids too, which my sources tell me has better food and also a more expansive menu, but i am pretty happy with what we have here.



i have been there twice now and i can't get over their beer list.  my sources also tell me that even though they have approximately 972 taps, they are regularly running out of things.  oh i'm sorry, you only have 834 beers available to me?  WELL WOE IS ME.  run out of all the beer you want hopcat, i can find something to drink on this list.

the first time i went there was for one of their tap takeover events, which is when they have like pretty much every beer ever created by a brewery.  that one was for atwater so you really could not go wrong.  i tried the macaroni and cheese and it was delicious, although i was slightly disappointed that it appeared to just get slopped in a crock right before serving with some breadcrumbs sprinkled on top rather than being all oozy and baked in the crock.  but the other side of that coin is that the food literally came in like 30 seconds.

tonight i had the amazing experience of their insane happy hour deal, which is a delicious burger (any burger you want!) with delicious fries AND a delicious beer for... wait for it... SIX.  DOLLARS.  yes, you read that right.  oh wait, i only get to pick from one of your top 20 taps for my beer?  and those top 20 taps include atwater vanilla java porter and dragonmead final absolution?  ugh, you guys are so stingy.

i like how the place looks and feels too.  it is really open with two floors of window walls and they got their hands on some of the cool antique lights from the MSU buildings that are slowly getting remodeled and the lighting is good in general (lighting is a thing for me).  service is good and friendly and prompt and attentive.  it can get busy, but it has never felt too crowded when i have been there.  of course granny has only been for dinner so who knows what it is like at like 1 am.

i also hear that they have a great brunch which involves a bloody mary bar so you know i will be spending a lot of quality time here in the future.

zoobie's

i forgot how time consuming blogging is... i have only been here for a month and i already have a list of places that i want to write about and am scrambling to find time to do it.

zoobie's is a great bar that i have already been to three times.  melissa was telling me that i needed to go here before i even moved here so i was really excited about it.

they have an excellent beer list (i know i keep saying this about every place but i'm not over it).  they have delicious craft cocktails which is super exciting for me of course.  and they have truffle oil popcorn!  not much other food, but you can gorge yourself on this shit and die happy as your heart gasps its last artery clogged breaths.

zoobie's is low key without being a hole in the wall.  i am thinking that the people who hang out there are lansing's brand of hipsters, which are a lot less annoying than cincinnati's brand of hipsters.

they also do interesting things like one night when i was there with matt and melissa we ended up in a connect four tournament.  of course i could not figure out how to play even after having it explained to me like five times and i lost in the first round.  but a good time was had by all.  or if i want to avoid the wrath of english teachers everywhere, all had a good time.

there is not much else that needs to be said about this place but it is a great place to hang out and it's always somewhat busy but never too busy (says the person who first went there a week ago).  zoobie's has lots of visits from me to look forward to/try to avoid at all costs.

tavern 109

annette and kevin came to visit today to bring me some furniture and help me attach my tv to the wall with one of those arm thingies so i can pretend i'm a real grown up with a tv over my fireplace.  we wanted to eat before trying to do any manual labor and i thought it would be nice to kill 2 birds with one stone (brunch + cocktails) so i suggested tavern 109 in williamston.

it's one of these new american type places with the whole wood floor/exposed brick/big windows things going on.  i enjoy that kind of a vibe.

 infused liquors

the cocktails were great.  kevin and i got the bacon infused bourbon manhattan and it was good (i did think it was a little strange that it came on the rocks but that's probably for the best at 12 pm anyway).  annette's bloody mary was delicious and had a bunch of nice snacks on a stick (cheese, pepperoni, olives, pickles, celery, etc.).

annette and kevin got the chili and really liked it.  then annette and i got the ham and cheese sandwich which is basically a croque monsieur on white bread and it was delicious.  we also got the macaroni and cheese and it was fine but nothing to write home about.  kevin got the shrimp po boy and he ate the whole thing so i'm assuming he liked it.  worth noting is that kevin made a fuss about not wanting brunch and they let him order off the full menu so that's nice.

(mac + cheese) + (ham + cheese)

service was ok.  the server didn't come by very often and we had to wait a while to get things like cream and sugar for coffee, the bill, etc.  maybe they were understaffed?  we were in the second room so we couldn't really tell how busy it was in the front room.

this is like a NORMAL RESTAURANT TAP LIST here!!!

overall i think this is a decent brunch option although it is a bit far from lansing.  the menu included both whitefish dip and chicken and waffles which made me happy even though i didn't order any of them.  and there was an amazing draft list but that seems to just be the norm around here.

the best pizza in cincinnati is back!

any extremely dedicated stragglers who still happen to read this blog will remember how obsessed i was with pizza night (so obsessed, in fact, that i refused to even write about it until it was over. you can read about it on my forkheartknife post... scroll down a ways). i mentioned in that post that they were going to be opening a restaurant.

well the heavens have parted and the glory of heaven is shining down upon us because a tavola is (hopefully) going to actually open soon! apparently things took longer than expected (including the delivery of a specially made wood burning italian pizza oven). they are going to be in the space on vine street next to where abigail street is supposed to open.

baby jesus must really love me because i happened to run into bill on one of my obsessive forkheartknife runs recently and he invited me to come to a tasting night they were doing. the space is still under construction but they wanted to do a test run of some of their pizzas and cocktails.

i think my tastebuds must have some type of memory loss issue because DAMN that pizza was good, so fucking good, i forgot how good. that night i had the margherita, a prosciutto/smoked gouda/caraway seed miracle, bill's awesome homemade sausage, mushroom, and maybe one or two others which i am blanking on. it's like the opposite of childbirth... your body makes you forget how fucking amazing the pizza is otherwise you would be too depressed whenever you weren't eating it. all pizza is completely homemade in every possible way, with jared making the dough and sauce which are both so unbelievably good that i think there has to be some type of illegal activity involved.

as an extra treat they were also testing out their cocktail menu. sam and keller are the bartenders. sam has been traveling to the best cocktail bars in the country to get inspiration and wisdom and it shows in the drinks he was making. he makes his own elixirs... i can't think of a better word (there probably is one) but it's these mesmerizing mixes of flavors and scents in bottles that then go in your drink. he also follows a strict no added sugar policy, which i love since i can't stand sweet drinks.

this is serious, creative craft cocktail mixing that is on a level i have not seen in cincinnati. i know, you guys are going to throw your roms and your mollys at me, and i definitely respect their cocktail mixing talents. however, there is personality and art behind the drinks that will be appearing at a tavola and it is different from what anybody else in this city is doing.

as for the space, it is long and open. you can see everything that happens in the kitchen. up front will be a bar area where people can hang out, and further back the tables. there are hardwood floors, high ceilings, exposed ductwork and brick, and lots of big mirrors.

i'm very excited for a tavola to open and i just hope that you bastards don't mob the place so that i can't get a table for 2 hours. i still haven't been to senate for that very reason. hopefully this addition to the vine street restaurant strip will make everybody's life a little easier, and i will get to eat a chuck norris dog and wash it down with the wood fired pizza of my dreams.

cincinnati cocktail quest: the blood and sand

with my bloody mary quest well underway, i can now focus on other tasty adult beverages. my new holy grail of cocktails is the blood and sand. what is the blood and sand, you ask? as well you should, since if you have not had one you are missing out on one of life's great pleasures, right up there with winning the lottery or finding out it isn't cancer after all.

wikipedia to the rescue:

Blood and Sand is a scotch based cocktail introduced in 1922. The red juice of the blood orange in the drink helped link it with the recently released film the cocktail was named after, Rudolph Valentino's bullfighter movie Blood and Sand. The recipe first appeared in the 1930 Savoy Cocktail Book.

Blood and Sand

Primary alcohol by volume
* Scotch whisky
* Vermouth

Served: Straight up; without ice

Standard garnish: Maraschino cherry, Flamed orange zest

Standard drinkware: cocktail glass / collins glass

Commonly used ingredients
* 1 oz blended scotch
* 1 oz blood orange juice
* ¾ oz sweet vermouth
* ¾ oz Cherry Heering

Preparation: Pour all ingredients into cocktail shaker filled with ice cubes. Shake well. Strain into Cocktail glass. Flame orange zest over the top of the glass.

Notes: A variant is to combine all ingredients in a collins glass, add another splash of orange juice then flame the zest over it.

i discovered this life alteringly delicious drink in chicago over new year's. lavine and i were gorging ourselves on the gluttonous gustatory riches of longman & eagle when i overheard a girl next to me practically trading away her future first born child in an effort to persuade the bartender to make her a blood and sand. after she got the drink (which involved melting the oil of an orange peel out of the orange peel and into the drink) she started moaning and flailing like a quaker in a jesus filled ecstasy.

we took one look at that display and the facts that it was 2 pm, that we had already had 3 cocktails each, and that we were on our way to see black swan all went down the toilet. we had to have that drink. it was just as good as we hoped. the fact that it has cherry liqueur in it makes it over the top because cherry is my absolute favorite fruit and it's pretty much impossible to get a delicious, not overly sweet, cherry flavored cocktail.

at the new year's party the next night, my friend marc tried to make the drink and while i applaud his efforts, it just didn't come out nearly as good. but at least in chicago you can get it at bars. i haven't seen it anywhere on any cocktail menu in cincinnati. which isn't to say that there aren't good bartenders who know how to make it, but it just makes me wonder if anyone really knows how to do it right. the wise one (cherry infused woodford reserve + simple syrup + fresh lemon juice + fresh sage) at the bar at palm court is extremely delicious and hits the cherry spot, but it is not the same.

readers, i need this drink in my life. has anyone seen it around town? please help a lush in need.

cincinnati bloody mary rankings

there is nothing better than a good bloody mary and there is nothing worse than a bad bloody mary. i have been on a lazy, meandering quest over the past year or so to figure out where to get good bloody marys in cincinnati. here are my findings so far. i will update these rankings as i drink more bloody marys.

all places only got one shot to prove their bloody mary skills. if you serve me a bad bloody mary once, i am never going to try it again so you better get it right the first time. i don't want to hear any whining that i need to give whatever place another try. if i am spending $7-12 for undrinkable bitter swill that gives me heartburn and bloody mary ptsd, you are off my list permanently.

the queen bloody of the queen city is at cityview tavern

here is what i am looking for in a bloody mary:

• strong, savory, spicy tomato flavor. it should be rich, thick, and have a depth of flavor
• no discernible alcohol flavor. if i want to taste my liquor i will order a gimlet or a vodka tonic. also, it's a brunch drink and i don't need to get drunk at noon. at least that is what my sponsor tells me.
• no bitterness. this is a cardinal sin because it makes the entire drink undrinkable. i can't tell you how many watery, bitter bloody marys i have been served in my life. disgusting, disappointing, and totally avoidable.
• good garnishes. if i like a bloody mary then i am someone who is into briny, salty flavors. if all you stick in there is a dried out celery stalk and a sliver of lime, i am going to be pissed. i am fine with omitting the celery altogether actually in favor of pickled green beans or carrots or asparagus. get creative and also i want a lot of shit in there, not just one thing.
• spicy but not too spicy. my stomach is empty and i do not need to start the day with heartburn.

the good, in order of how good they are:

1. cityview tavern: believe the hype... this is the epitome of bloody mary perfection. rich, savory, smooth, and full of flavor. not a hint of bitterness and the flavors just go together perfectly. did not give me heartburn at all. the spicy/salty/peppery mix on the rim was perfect. very nice pickled vegetables (green beans, olives, etc.)
2. nada's bloody maria: a very close second. nice call on the peppadew garnish and the substitution of tequila for vodka just works. very flavorful and not too spicy. also a similar rim spice mix to cityview. this one was just ever so slightly less thick and robust, and did not have any big crunchy pickled things in it. very good showing however.
3. otto's: nice and horseradishy. rich and thick and a big portion. it gets docked a few points for inconsistency but if you get a really good one, you will be very happy.
4. honey: good and will scratch your bloody mary itch. one big fat celery stalk does not cut it in the garnish department, and it's not as complexly flavored or rich as others above it.
5. neon's: very average. it is too spicy for me (even when i ask for it to come not too spicy) and also is just not very flavorful overall. however, it earns points for having lots of excellent garnishes (including cheese, pepperoni, and blue cheese stuffed olives, yum).

neon's bloody mary

do not even bother drinking these bloody marys, in no particular order:

• the comet: it was like 90% vodka and 10% flavorless red stuff, and was tiny and overpriced. bleah.
• motr: a bitter, watery disaster. i think i got heartburn just from looking at it. was this a cocktail or a punishment?

bloody marys i still need to try (please tell me if there are others i am missing)

• jeff ruby's walnut street grill: it is made with bacon infused vodka. i need this drink.
• teller's: i hear they have a garnish bar... yum
• the pub at rookwood: another garnish bar. why haven't i been to these places yet?
• orchids: they can do no wrong in any other area of food or drink. although i have not heard anything about it, i am sure their bloody mary is a serious contender
• keystone: i have heard they have a number of different bloody mary options which means they take the drink seriously
• roxy's: i have had other good mixed drinks there so i think they are up to the challenge